Tackling the Holiday Nag Factor
By Nathan Dungan
Soon enough it will be the
season for the "I wants" to kick into overdrive in millions of homes
across the United States. With more than $220 billion at stake during the
holiday season, companies will pull out all the stops to be the product
that completes the well-worn phrase "I want a (blank)!"
When the average family needs
a wheel barrow to collect the daily barrage of mail-order catalogs, an
enormous red flag should go up in towns across the country signaling
"rough seas ahead." Even the most disciplined families have trouble
maintaining healthy consumer boundaries this time of year.
It hasn't always been like
this. Recently I interviewed a couple in their early 70s who remembered
that when they were raising their children in the 1950s and 1960s, there
was one catalog (and no Internet) in the house during the holidays. The
instructions to their four children were very straightforward:
"Put your initials next to the
things you want, but remember you will only get two presents each." And
nagging wasn't permitted. They felt it was the best way to manage the
kids' expectations and their sanity.
I doubt we will ever
experience a one-catalog holiday again. So this season consider setting
the following boundaries for managing consumer expectations in your
family:
-
Set a limit (dollar and
quantity) for how many items your child can ask for.
-
Set a dollar limit for total
family holiday spending.
-
Institute a "no nagging" rule.
If the rule is broken more than three times, consider removing a privilege
(telephone time, going to a movie, etc).
-
Tell your relatives
(especially grandparents) what you are doing and ask for their support.
Even the most diligent families struggle with controlling the nag factor
this time of year. Ask your friends what works for them. Sometimes the
best ideas are right in your own neighborhood.
By no means is this an
exhaustive list. Use it as a guide to manage the "nag factor," early in
the holiday season.
Finally, perhaps the best
anecdote for minimizing the nag factor is redirecting some of your child's
energy to helping others. Whether it's sharing money and/or time with a
worthy cause, instilling a sense of gratitude in a young person can be an
important step to helping them develop healthy financial habits.
On that note, Lutheran Social
Service's Sponsor a Family program is an excellent outlet for just such an
activity. Not only can you help a worthy family by donating essential
items for their use, but the experience will also serve as a valuable
teachable moment for the youth in your family as they shop for items that
are clearly "needs" not "wants."
Nathan Dungan is the
president and founder of ShareSaveSpend™ - an organization that helps
youth and adults achieve financial sanity by developing and maintaining
healthy financial habits. To learn more, visit
www.sharesavespend.com.
